Single and Happy in Detroit: Letting Go of Things From the Past

Oftentimes in life we hold on to things in our past that reminds us of times that we don’t want to forget. But these are the things we should let go of to move on in our lives. For me its high heel shoes.

Believe it or not 4 and 5 inch shoes really played a significant role in how I felt about myself as a woman. Each time I slipped my foot into those shoes I stood tall at 5 feet 7 inches and 5 feet 8 inches, respectively. When I walked out that front door in my heels I felt like I was walking on top of the world. All that changed, however, the early morning of December 30, 2010 when I woke up early in the morning highly eager about picking up my new hearing aides. I went outside to my car, wearing my rubber ducky boots to retrieve a document from my car only to fall off the front porch and subsequently break my right ankle. That one incident changed the entire course of my life within seconds. I went from feeling like a brick house to a boat house. After being bed bound for nearly 4 months I got out of my bed nearly 30 pounds heavier and flat on the ground stuck at 5 feet 3 inches tall. I no longer felt like I was walking on top of the world, now I felt like the world was walking on top of me.

It wasn’t until nearly a year later that I realized I shortchanged myself by defining who I am by materialistic things, which actually diminished the true value of who I really am as a person. The essence of who I am as person never left me, however when I dug deeper into my soul I realized that the high heels really had more to do with me not wanting to let go of the past. You see, not long before my accident I met a man who I thought was the most wonderful person in the world and he’s the reason why I gave my whole look an overhaul. After things ended between us certain things about us I kept close to my heart and well, those high heel shoes were one of those things. They made me think about the smile on his face whenever he saw me wear them or the look is eyes that made me feel like the most beautiful woman in the world.

I’m so glad that I fell off that porch and went through the things that I ultimately went through because it was the wake-up call I need to finally let go of the things in my past so that I could welcome with open arms the things in my future. Now that I have placed the past where it belongs and I’m able to wear high heels again, when I put them on I don’t see the look in his eyes anymore. I see the smile in my own reflection, seeing what a beautiful woman I have become and how much I’ve healed from letting go of things from the past.

Before anyone else can love you completely you have to love yourself...deeply.
~Shantel